Battleship

REVIEW:

This film gets so much hate and critics ripped it apart upon release and I really don’t understand why? Is it a masterpiece? No, far from it. Is it one of my favourite films? No, but this is a big, loud and enjoyable blockbuster! The best advice I can give is feel the momentum of the movie, take it for what it is and you will have a great time. It’s unapologetically popcorn cinema, never pretending to be more than an alien-versus-navy spectacle.

This might be a hot-take but I would argue that I much prefer this movie over most of the Transformers films, which comparing them is unavoidable but I prefer the action, I prefer the characters and if I had to choose, I would rather put Battleship on. The action doesn’t feel as chaotic, the pacing is sharper, and there’s something oddly endearing about its straightforwardness. Where Bay’s films often collapse under excess, Peter Berg delivers a spectacle that still has room for personality.

It’s just a coincidence that I am reviewing this movie a few days after the release of The Terminal List: Dark Wolf but I really like Taylor Kitsch and I feel like he gets a bad rap because he starred in some big-budget flops such as John Carter. But is he to blame? No, he’s not. I think this movie is proof that he is a leading man. He brings a grounded charm to Alex Hopper that sells the underdog story, even when the dialogue around him leans toward the cheesy. If anything, Battleship shows what Kitsch can do when he’s allowed to just have fun in a role.

This movie is a guilty pleasure, a fun, entertaining action ride that knows exactly what it is. The soundtrack fits the explosive tone and, of course, the standout is Thunderstruck by AC/DC when they are preparing the USS Missouri. That moment is pure over-the-top bravado but also undeniably crowd-pleasing. It’s built to make audiences grin even while they know how ridiculous it is. That mix of shameless confidence and big-scale energy is where the film finds its spark.

The movie is directed by Peter Berg but it does feel like a Michael Bay project. It’s loaded with patriotic beats, dramatic slow-motion, and relentless set-pieces. The CGI is plentiful and still looks solid, particularly with the alien ships and the shimmering force field sequences. When Alexander Skarsgård’s destroyer is wiped out, it really underscores how completely outmatched the Navy is against this unknown threat.

I kept asking myself what connection this film actually had to the Battleship board game, and apart from the clever use of the water buoys as a targeting system, there’s almost nothing. It’s Battleship in title only. Part of me wishes they leaned harder into the absurdity of adapting a board game; even a cheeky “You sunk my battleship” line would have been a fun nod. Without it, the board game connection feels more like marketing than inspiration.

Another puzzling choice is the casting of Rihanna. Say what you will about her acting, she doesn’t sink the film, but her role still feels out of place. She’s fine, just not memorable. On top of that, some character decisions clearly exist just for the sake of cool visuals. Hopper and Nagata scaling the stern of a sinking ship instead of jumping off the side makes little sense beyond creating a dramatic shot. And moments like the aliens sparing Cal, despite their supposed mission, are inconsistent and leave you scratching your head.

At the end of the day, this movie is big, dumb, silly fun and I enjoyed it for what it is. The flaws are many, but they’re the sort of flaws you shrug off if you accept the film’s tone. It’s not groundbreaking, it’s not sophisticated, but it’s far from the disaster people claim it to be. Sometimes all you want is a film that embraces its absurdity, throws aliens against battleships, and cranks Thunderstruck to full volume. Battleship does exactly that, and honestly, that’s enough.